Fake friends and the sesh..

Are your fake friends using you to get high or drunk and ruining your life in the process?

By Fatz

You can look at the sesh in two ways…

Harmless fun:

It’s only a Sesh (session – usually drink or drugged fuelled), it’s what people or ‘friends’ do to unwind and its fun filled. It doesn’t matter how often it happens, it’s your life. Sometimes it ends up at some randomers place at 5am.

You’ve been talking absolute shit for hours, you hardly know who these people are but hey thats what happens in Sesh life. The suns starting to rise and you’re now questioning the meaning of life. It’s been a crazy night, which has lead you to some crazy places.

Will there be another Sesh next weekend, most likely, but for now its two days of rest and recovery with a come down..

Deeper self destruction (Usually what happens):

It’s a Sesh that you didn’t think would happen, yet always seems to happen with the same group of friends. It costs too much money, ruins things at home usually with your partner and you have a fear it’s an addiction problem.

This leads to depression, anxiety, fear and regret. Yet you can’t seem to break free from your ‘friends’, or the substance abuse.You don’t want to feel left out of the social events and constantly tell yourself this time will be different.

You know a good messy night once an a while is absolutely fine, but you can’t seem to stop. Your messy nights are costing you a bomb and they are happening weekly, possibly even a couple times a week. You’ve got into debt, you feel terrible and its a violent rollercoaster you can’t seem to get off.

Ok you lied already, you said it wouldn’t happen or didn’t expect it to happen but you know full well where it usually leads hanging around with the same group of people. So why lie to yourself?

If its so toxic and detrimental to your mental health why do it?

Why do you feel the need to attend these social events, that make you feel bad in the end?

Why don’t your ‘friends’ care about your mental health and the other areas of your life you may be sacrificing for these messy nights?

If you don’t think this effects you and don’t see a problem, then forget reading any more and carry on with your life.

If you feel you may be negatively effected by drink, drugs, false friendships and its effecting other areas of your life, then please read on.

YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

“It is crazy to me now that you can suffer from anxiety, depression, lack of money, or simply unhappy in life. Then hang around with fake ass friends who encourage drink and drug use, with poor choices that escalate your negative mindset and negative self destructive lifestyle. But that’s exactly how I lived and so many do, not knowing that it’s all a distraction”. – Fatz

THE BIG SESH

The Sesh usually starts on a Friday afternoon whilst you’re still at work. Its been a long week and you’re craving some down time this weekend, a cold drink with some friends maybe a quick pint and the usual banter, a little chit chat. Obviously it’s highly likely too much drink will be involved and even some drug use. But you don’t want that, because its effecting your life negatively..

In the back of your mind you know its probably a good idea to leave it this weekend, stay at home and do something productive. Maybe spend time with your other half, because lord knows you’ve left them in the dark long enough and you may even feel some guilt for that. Have you been lying to your other half? Lying about money? Lying about nights out and cheating? Are you hiding a addiction from someone?

Although the idea of staying in, saving money, being healthier or spending quality time with the other half or even family is defiantly a good option. But what will you really do? What will you miss from your social circle? Will they stop inviting you next time? Worse yet, will you feel like you’ve let them down for the Sesh? Why do you feel this way?

Ok no seriously you can do this, dinner out with the other half, or a early night and a adventure the next day. Ok your mind is made up, its not fair to go out and spend a load of money on drink and drugs all the time. This lifestyle is leading you nowhere fast and its really bring you down mentally.It may be effecting your financial situation, relationships, or your employment..

So why the FUCK do we get the usual text “Up for a pint”, then give in without question. We know in most cases this simple text leads far further than just a civilised pint, in no time at all you’re a few bags (cocaine) in, £50 down at the bar and already arguing with someone at home about where you are.

Why can’t you say no? Why does it effect you so much? Is it really an addiction?

After this questions are ignored time and time again the nigh carries on, your either onto another bar, a club or some cunts kitchen. You know you should have been home hours ago, you’ve spunked your weeks wages again and to be fair your looking a fucking mess for it. But lets go with the flow..

The times been ticking along, if you do have an other half thats fucked again and you’ve got one hell of an argument to deal with. If you’ve been a cunt and cheated then you’ve got that guilt mentality to deal with also. Maybe you’ve got no one to go home to but you’ve cleared your bank account and now worried about money at 5am in some cunts kitchen, whilst everyone looks like they’ve chewing on wasps..

Now you’re questioning your actions, in a few hours you’ll be at home crying maybe, or craving your next drink, thinking about the next Sesh. As facing the reality of your debt, arguments, declining mental healthy and unhealthy living is not something you want to face. Maybe this is the reason we get fucked up so much and ruin life in many ways, repetitively. When will you learn?

Oh well its now 6am and someone’s passing you another line to sniff, you’ve turned your phone off so you don’t get the agro from someone who actually cares for you. Thats another line down, the beers are running out and at some point this all ends. Oh well one more beer and those future issues are for the sober you…

THE ESCAPE OR SOLUTION

If you feel you face any of these issues or questions, then its best you get some help fast and re-evaluate your so called ‘friends’. Real friends don’t encourage poor mental health or substance abuse if you don’t feel right. Real friends don’t fuck you off just because you don’t get fucked up with them. Real friends may be one of your biggest issues here..

That said we must also take responsibility for our own actions, no on is forcing you to get involved although it may seem at times you don’t have many other options. The fact is you have loads of options, choices and its down to you to choose the one that best serves you, for your own mental and physical well being.

Its hard to Sesh alone, if you do then thats a substance abuse issue you have and not just a addictive personality fitting in or being mislead by Sesh head ‘friends’. If you do need substance help the try talking to some real friends, talk about your addictions, your worries and seek real advice from experts.

My advice and how I changed my life:

Stop hanging around with fake friends who just want to get fucked up with you, they are leading you nowhere fast and you know it. Distance yourself from these people even if just slowly at first, but start moving away from negative people.
Learn to be ok with saying “NO”, or “No thank you mate I’m tired”. You don’t need to be rude or feel a prick by putting you first, you can and have the right to say no to anything you don’t want to do. Learn to be ok with putting you first, your family, your mindset, your job..
Do one thing productive every day, it doesn’t even have to be something big. A small walk, read a few pages of a book, watch a short motivational video. Just the idea of feeding your mind with goodness will allow you to really grow as a person. This could be the start to your new found self development and potentially new interests.
New social circles, yes new friends. That doesn’t mean you abandon or become a prick to old friends, but it does allow you to create new positive friendships with people who have drive, desire, ambitions.
A new hobby or interest, such as a new gym, a running club, etc. Whatever it is you can talk to others in that hobby, again making you stay focused away from drink, drugs, negativity.